These Amazing Parents Are Coming Out in Support of Their Queer Kids

Home can be many things. While it can be a sanctuary and a refuge from a crazed world, it could also be a place where those closest to you might have no idea of your sexual orientation. When the draconian Section 377 was read down last week, celebrations broke out across India. But nothing can beat having unconditional support, acceptance and love at home—something many from the LGBTQ community are still struggling to find. In this atmosphere, I looked for queer friends whose parents have been unprejudiced and accepting of their children. These are my favourite four.

Ashish Chopra, 23

Ashish’s mother is one of the most ardent allies I know, even marching the 2017 Delhi Pride with her gay son. She also encouraged him to enter into the Mr Gay World India pageant, insisting that their friends and relatives vote for him. “The cutest thing happened the day of the Section 377 ruling, which also happened to be my sister’s birthday,” Chopra tells me. “When I posted the judgement on my family’s Whatsapp group, my relatives stopped wishing my sister and began congratulating me instead.” The only acceptable time to steal your sister’s birthday thunder, I guess.

Aayushi Jagad, 26

Aayushi has identified as bisexual for several years now, but officially came out to her father only a few months ago. He took it surprisingly well, smiling at her with a crooked, semi-sarcastic “Really?”. This lack of drama was not entirely unsurprising. All through her life, her father would conclude any argument with her with the same statement: “If you’re happy, I’m happy.” His succinctness extended to the scrapping of parts of Section 377 as well, with a quiet quip: “Aa toh saaru che ne?” (Isn’t this good?), before going back to reading the newspaper. “However, my complaint is that queerness is not a bone of contention in the family,” jokes Aayushi. “I was kind of looking forward to the drama and an emotional roller-coaster.” Some people just live for the histrionics, don’t they?

Trinetra Haldar Gummaraju, 21

Trinetra, a transwoman, came out as a gay man to her parents when she was 14. It happened over a heated argument over Karan Johar’s “flamboyance”, which her parents thought of as bizarre. But after that evening, her parents never spoke of her sexuality, save policing behaviour that they thought of as effeminate. “However, I finally realised what they were thinking when a relative posted homophobic remarks on Facebook,” she says. “They were furious. Arguments broke out online, and both my parents staunchly offered their support to me. It was unbelievable.” When Trinetra came out as transgender in 2015, it only cemented a candid relationship between her and her parents. In fact, when she posted a reaction video to the judgement, her parents shared it on Facebook with words brimming with joy and hope for their daughter's future.

Shreya Panigrahi, 19

When Shreya broke up with her college girlfriend, she tried to reaffirm heteronormativity by sleeping with random boys she had met on a dating app. But it got so mentally debilitating and confusing that she had to ask her mother to fly down to lend her support. It was then that she managed to gather the courage to tell her mother that she was gay, to which her mom responded with an utter breakdown. “When I started apologising, my mom just wiped her tears and told me to shut up,” she says. “She said that she was not upset with me because of my confession but because I would have to deal with being queer apart from all the other things that girls in this country have to deal with.” When the verdict was announced last week, Shreya called her mom to tell her how glad she was to not be a criminal anymore. Her mom paused for a second and simply said, “You were never a criminal to begin with.”